Tuesday, August 11, 2009

World Friend Collision Events

This is my new expression for those times when friends from your different "worlds" come together in one event.  So, if my sex educator friends, a couple of clergy colleagues, a few parishioners and my drinking friends get together for a party celebrating the release of a CD by a friend from college (whether he's there or not), that would be a World Friend Collision Event.  Or, if while visiting NYC with Backbencher, we dine with folk from Marble Church, Broadway UCC and NYU, that would also count.  You get the idea.

Like many folk, I used to get worked up about these kinds of events, hoping people would connect and trying to find some of those points of contact in advance so that I could have some ways to direct conversation.  And, I don't know, sometimes that worked.  But more often, people found other cool stuff in common and bonded over that, without my help, or I learned all sorts of new things about all kinds of friends....or it just didn't work out.  My friends didn't bond.  In which case, Apples to Apples seldom lets me down.

But part of being a recovering perfectionist means I try letting go of outcomes around these sorts of things.  If I think people would mesh well together, I try to bring them together and let stuff happen.  If I don't think they mesh well together ... well, that's why we have different circles of friends.  I guess.  I kind of like it when my worlds collide, overall.  I think it has something to do with wholeness and integrity of self.  Naturally, I don't expect all my friends to be friends with each other, but I like when points of contact and relationship between mutual friends (that don't put me at the center of the relationship) emerge.

Weddings and funerals don't count as WFCE's - but lunch at India Star in Des Moines this Friday does!  If you're in the area, come join us at 12:30ish.  I have a board meeting in the morning for the Iowa Initiative to Reduce Unintended Pregnancies, so I'll be all fancily dressed, but you can wear your casual clothes.
See you at WFCE '09!

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